On Monday I said goodbye to my friend and mentor at his funeral. Those who knew him celebrated his life by sharing memories and tears with one another. It was beautiful and it was heartbreaking. We spoke of all he had achieved in life and what legacy he had left us. The next day was my daughter's 2nd birthday and we celebrated her life thus far, remembering the joyous changes she wrought in our lives and hoping for a rich, fulfilling future for her.
Having these two events occur in quick succession, one can't help but make comparisons. With a birthday there isn't the same heartache as with a funeral - the difficult thoughts of never seeing your friend again, the struggle with the fact that they deserved so much more time. But the celebration of their life feels very similar: how lucky we feel to have had that person be a part of our lives and commemorating their achievements to this point (even if those achievements, in the case of my toddler, are just learning to walk and talk). Instead of sadness at their passing we may feel worries for their future: "will I be a good enough mum to guide you through?" "How can I protect you from hardships in life when you are no longer under my care 24/7?" "I dearly hope that life will be kind to you." And these thoughts can carry their own special kind of pain.
The similarities I see make me realise the importance of the present moment - we may look backwards, we may look forwards, but the now is all we have. Let's make the most of it.
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